Here is one of my stories for a while back. I pulled it up and laughed all over again. I hope you do too!
I’m in my 40s and I thought as long as I have lived, I shouldn’t be too surprised at everyday life with my kids. I was wrong. Some of the stuff they come up with is just too much for me to take in, let alone have a proper reply. There are days I just giggle at it all, shake my head and just wish my own parents were still here to see that it is so very true when people say that you will pay for your raisin’.
For instance, Teenie (7) and I were coming home from church one Sunday. She says, “Mom, why do we call God, God? He can’t be named after anyone like I am because he was the first one who started everything.”
I was completely thrown off my game. I don’t know that anyone has ever asked that. What a great question! Of course I had no idea, but I did manage to recoup after the initial shock and came up with, “Well he is our Father in heaven, right? So think of God as Good Ol’ Dad (GOD).” That was divine intervention. I’m not asking for approval here, but someone should give me props for a fast response. Heck, I broke a sweat on that one.
Same child, different situation: Teenie walks in and says, “I need $3 for the zoo and I have to bring it on Tuesday.”
I say, “I’ll give it to you but are you fibbing about needing it tomorrow? You don’t go until Friday.”
She stands there with huge pupils, all excited and says, “No, not this time momma, I promise. THIS is important!”
Then there is Leah. I often refer to her a “Bail Money” because she is the youngest and just plain somethin’ else!
She (now 5) walked in as I was putting some of her old clothes in a plastic bag for the daycare, when she was around 3 years old. She says (in her tiny little voice), “Mom what are you doing wiff my cwothes?”
I said, “Well sometimes the kids at daycare have accidents so I am sending these for them to change into when they need extras.” She gets really mad at me and turns around and yells, “Fine, then I am donna pee my pants today and then I tan bwing them back home wiff me, cause they have to change me when dat happens.”
Wow. Those were her clothes and she meant they weren’t staying at daycare. Not that I condone her yelling, but I couldn’t do anything but laugh. That’s a pretty smart answer from a little kid.
By the way, she did not “pee” in them and bring them home. I am pretty sure she knew better than that.
Another Leah story that makes me laugh every time I think about it. We were all in the car and David said, “Man my forearms hurt this week.” He had stamped quite a bit of concrete I guess.
Leah, who looked up only briefly from playing a game on my phone, said, “Daddy that is riddiclus. Peoples don’t have four arms, they ownwee has two.” She was back there shaking her head and smiling, like he was so ignorant to think that way.
My kids aren’t any different than any others. Most kids are bright and they are witty and they can come up with stuff that is unreal. And then there are the days you may think twice about claiming them.
Emily, who is now 17 and a great, great student, went to take her ACT test awhile back. She texted me and said, “OMG mom I had to write our address on the ACT and I got it right!”
Pretty sure she needed more than that ONE answer correct on the ACT. I just laughed and laughed. We had recently moved and sadly, she usually had to ask her sister (in kindergarten at the time) what our address was. I can imagine how proud she was to get it right, AND on her ACT to boot!
All that to say, every single day is different. As cliché as it is, I have learned to expect the unexpected.And, I’m too old to chase them down, so I have to find the humor in some of it, just to keep my sanity. Hope you found a little bit of humor in it too.